Dry Spell

I do realize that all my friends think I'm having fantabulous sex on an hourly basis, but as much as I'd love that to be the case, or not, it's just not anywhere near reality. There are so many misconceptions about swingers out there, one of them being that we are all nymphomaniacal, crazy, and oversexed individuals who are completely devoid of any sort of self control when it comes to any type of sex. Really? Well, let take a real look at how my life and Malcolm's life really go.

First off, we don't live together because we have mothers. LOL, of all the things that keep us out of bed, those two women are number one on the list. Even more than our kids, our mothers and their health problems, appointments, and general neediness make sure we each have our share of daily grief. We've often joked that the solution is to move in together in my house, which is a duplex, and put the mothers together in the downstairs apartment while we live in relief of them upstairs. There would be a bloodbath, however, and it just really wouldn't work out, because I'm not sure who would win. Plus, his mother can still climb stairs, so we wouldn't exactly be scott free. Recently his mom had some serious enough medical issues to put her in the hospital. Dealing with her fears, and the frustration that inevitably she did this to herself has taken it's toll on Malcolm, and kept him from being able to make the trip to my house so that we can spend some quality personal time together. It's just too much to make the 45 minute drive after a full day at work, and then the few hours he put in at the hospital, then most likely be up most of the night because we just don't want to waste the time sleeping. Then to be up at 6 am the next morning to make the 45 minute drive back, and get ready for work. So we've been apart since my last post.

This isn't commonplace, but it does happen occasionally depending on, again, our mothers, kids and their activities, holidays and such. But even our daily schedules and that damn commute between us keep our together time from being what even he is antsy for...daily. He's encouraged me to think about moving closer to HIM. LOL...I've encouraged him to move closer to ME, and we find ourselves in a stalemate.

So what do we do about our sexual needs? Well, we text each other incessantly throughout the day. We talk on the phone for hours every day. We email each other all kinds of goodies. We both watch porn and talk about it to each other. He'll send up my boytoy for my pleasure. And he expects me to report back to him so that he can enjoy it by default, if he can't be there in person. And when we do get together, we make the absolute most of it. Dinner, fun, and lots and lots and lots of hands on cuddling, snuggling, snogging, fucking, and everything in between.

Once our times apart were so bad I was sure he had someone to take the edge off in between. I hedged for weeks before I built up enough courage to ask him straight up. It's not that I would have been pissed, I'd have understood, for real, that a man with his sexual appetite has needs to fulfill that I can't always be there for. I just wanted to know so that if he ever had a crazy one, like my ex did, that I wouldn't be blindsided by it. And, I'd like to hear about it too so that I could enjoy it with him. He often marvels that I'm not like typical women because I have a streak of realism in me as wide as the Atlantic Ocean. It is what it is, in the end, and no use getting all worked up, because finding yourself in a full lather over something rarely makes it better. His answer, however was so sweet, I actually teared up over it. He really does make me into such a cry baby. He said that he wasn't into quantity so much as quality, and that in the off times, he had a most wonderful porn collection, an active imagination, and a strong hand. And he had all the quality he was looking for in me...in our conversations, our fun times, our business adventures, our sex life, and our parenting. I couldn't agree more. I think when you find a partner that is the right one for you, it's the jigsaw puzzle piece just falling effortlessly into place. If you have to try and hammer it in, and there are all kinds of gaps that you're trying to ignore, it's not the right piece. Try another!!! and PUT THE HAMMER DOWN!!!! LOL

We're hoping to get together sometime next week...probably midweek-ish. There won't be enough time in all the world for me to get to relearn his body, his kiss, his control, his warmth. He'll use me tirelessly thru the night, every hole on my body anxious to receive him. He expects no less, nor would I ever dream of giving him less than what he deserves. We've texted some pretty raunchy scenarios to each other, especially this past week, with both of us really starting to feel the absence of the other most keenly. For the record, I also have not seen my boytoy since my last post, nor do I see other men on the side. So really really, when I say Dry Spell, I'm not kidding. We'll both be cresting a river of need when we finally meet again.